I love the holiday season. I’m giddy when we put up the tree and start decorating our house with the small touches of the holiday season. I enjoy catching up with old friends over holiday parties and events. I love how my boys would have hot cocoa for breakfast, lunch, and dinner if we let them. What’s better than a fire when it’s cold out (OK, Texas cold) and it’s perfect weather for snuggling (and my young boys love to snuggle — yay!).
But no matter which holiday(s) you celebrate, it’s easy to become overwhelmed this time of year. It’s normal to try to respond to everything coming at you instead of thinking through what you want the season to look like. I was like this too and then we decided to change things up. I’m sharing my thoughts to help you be intentional during the holidays this year.
Why We Changed Our Holiday Experience
A few years ago we were on vacation for almost two weeks over spring break and we decided to travel light. We had access to a washer and dryer in the places we were staying, which was a new experience for us. Our boys were also big enough to have a backpack for airplane and train travel, so we had them travel light too so that mom and dad didn’t have to feel like pack mules with all bags on top of everything else.
Here’s the thing. We were too busy having new experiences and seeing new things to even focus on the little stuff we had with us. And our boys didn’t miss their stuff. They were simply having fun.
When my husband and I talked more about it, we realized that the previous Christmas had leaned a little too far toward stuff. We want to lean more toward experiences and enjoying the holidays. We took what we learned on vacation and decided to change things. We would shift mindset and action so we could be intentional with our gifts and the overall experience.
The challenge became that our families were into gift-giving physical things. Stuff represented love in the eyes of both sets of grandparents. We had to change that behavior. And, I won’t lie, the sheer volume of stuff our boys received from grandparents definitely overwhelmed me. The boys would play with stuff for an hour and then the magic wore off. They would go back to playing with their favorite toys, which stood the test of time (and even new shiny objects).
Intentional Experiences
Our intention during the holidays is to focus on experiences and to give presents that enable experiences as well. We hang out with friends and family or have an adventure. Adventures could be day trips, exploring local spots we haven’t been to, or a hike if it’s a nice day. We take advantage of holiday-specific events too. Our younger son loves Christmas lights. OK, I’m a fan too. Nearby light displays? Yes please! We go to family-friendly lunch or dinner spots where we haven’t eaten before and ask friends, whose kids are friends with our boys, to join us. We see friends who don’t live nearby and actually have time to hang out. This shift to being intentional during the holidays helps us with our year-long intention of having adventures as a family.
More Experiences and Less Stuff
We ask for experiences from the grandparents. When our boys were younger, one set of grandparents started to gift us our annual children’s museum membership and something small for the boys to open up (e.g., books). What the experience is has changed over the years, but we still make this the big gift for the boys. The other set of grandparents usually gets us something to do on an upcoming vacation. We make sure to let our kids know that a specific experience is a gift from their grandparents. And we make sure it’s fun!
What do we get our boys? We try to include on gift cards for experiences with friends: movies, bowling, putt-putt, roller skating, etc. We want them to have fun with friends, making memories, instead of playing with stuff that loses its appeal in days. Don’t get me wrong. The boys get things they can play with, but that is often something that will keep them active. And, since they’re often in motion, these are likely things they’ll use/do.
Volunteer as a Family
Another layer of how we try to be intentional during the holidays is through volunteering. We try to focus some energy into giving back. We are very fortunate to live in a great place, and have a home we love and a life we enjoy. We get to spend time with family and friends having fun, but not everyone does, especially right now. We try to give back as a family to the community that we love so much. I am active on the board of a non-profit that gives birthdays to kids in foster care in Central Texas and the boys volunteer throughout the year. We pass by homelessness almost every day, so we see how we can make a difference. We see how we can help with activities that support natural areas around us.
Making Sure to Have Fun
And, our final intention is to have fun as a family (my husband and I are trying to work on this more as a couple as well). We will do some baking together, hiking in the cool weather, and a bunch of exploring nearby towns. There are great options for things like kids’ go-carts or putt-putt golf. We will eat pizza and watch movies that we all enjoy. We will listen to Christmas music while building with LEGOs or drawing. We want to enjoy the moments together instead of trying to only focus on getting things done and moving on to the next task on the to-do list.
The Intention of Self-Care
A focus on self-care is another way to be intentional during the holidays. I don’t know about you, but I feel the pull of my to-do list so that I get one more thing done. I must intentially carve out me time. This year I’m going to fit in reading books, journaling, taking a bubble bath, and having an at-home date night with my hubby with some cheese and yummy bread with a nice bottle of wine. None of these things takes a huge amount of effort, but they will certainly fill my cup.
You have the power to choose what your holidays look like. What is your intention for the holidays? What changes are you working on?
Want to know more about how to set up your own intentions for the holidays and beyond, check out my how to blog so you can make your own intentions.
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