Working moms are often challenged by normal life. Add a pandemic (with virtual learning for their kids), return to office after working parents have proven they can get everything done from home, economic uncertainty, and global crises. It’s no wonder that working moms are feeling the weight of uncertainty. It’s not enough to talk about it. We need to share practical tips and actionable ideas to help each other feel in control and confident during this moment of uncertainty. I’ve got 7 tips to help working moms deal with uncertainty.
Feel all the feels
Give yourself space to feel all your emotions instead of jumping to gratitude that you and your family are OK. When it comes to tips to help working moms deal with uncertainty, there is no need for the toxic positivity of feeling grateful all the time. We each have different situations and reactions to recent events. It’s easy to say that you should hold your kids tight and be thankful. You might not think it’s OK to laugh and find joy when you see suffering across the world or with your neighbor who has recently been laid off.
Don’t get bogged down by the sadness or anger. Don’t only try to focus on happy thoughts in this moment. Give yourself space and time to feel all the feels. Allow yourself to feel sad, frustrated, angry, grateful, happy, etc. And then take a moment to find the things that do give you hope. Embrace joy when you can.
Review your online habits
I get that you want to be an informed professional and citizen. It’s helpful to be knowledgeable about what is going on. Don’t doom scroll, though. You will easily find negative information. Negative news sells. You might not get the full picture since bad news gets more eyeballs.
Look at news stories, but limit your time on the news. Essentially, use time boxing to look at the news. Maybe even set a timer to help you manage your time on news sites. That way, you feel informed, but you avoid moving to doomscrolling.
Also consider intentionally curating your news sources. Look at reliable news sources to find your information. There is misinformation everywhere! As tempting as it is, try to not create echo chambers, though. And please consider setting parameters for the kinds of information you might want on social media. Yes, the algorithm feeds you, but you can set the parameters to help you reset what you see. And be aware of what you click on to like or give your attention to on social media.
Focus on what you can control
You can put your energy into a lot of things, but focus on what you can control in moments of uncertainty. Of all of my tips to help working moms deal with uncertainty, I think this one is key. Understanding what you can control can make a big difference in your life always, but especially in these uncertain times.
Consider managing your time online as one way of controlling your situation or reacting to uncertainty. Be present as you spend time with family and friends and engage with colleagues or employees. Give yourself permission to slow down and step away from things like news and social media without having to explain why to others. See how you can spend your time connecting to family and friends in a meaningful way. Take time for things like family meals or meeting with friends for a coffee. Find moments of gratitude when you can.
Depending on your situation, can you create contingency plans? If you own a business, you can absolutely put these in place. You can also think about what decisions you can make differently, based on what’s going on around you. For example, look at your budget to see if you have wiggle room. You might have cut back during the pandemic and then started spending again as things improved. Maybe it’s time to look at where you previously cut back and consider taking the same actions again.
Want to take action in a bigger way? Consider reaching out to your government officials or joining an organization where you can make an impact on something you’re passionate about.
Keep your eyes on your own lane
I’ve recently listened to several podcasts and read articles about the impact of social media, especially on your mental health. Comparing yourself to others’ highlight reels can make you feel less than. It can bring you down or add to your stress levels of what you must do right now and in general.
Get ideas, but don’t compare. Life is what happens between pictures. That’s not on social media. Like with the news, consider time boxing your time on social media. And remember that you can take a break from social media and not have to tell others about your motivation.
Manage your stress
I strongly believe that some stress is good. Chronic or too much stress isn’t. And let’s be honest, it’s been a stressful few years for working moms especially. How does stress management fit into things? You know how chronic stress or highly stressful situations can trigger your fight or flight response, but you can also feel frozen. All of these responses result in an inability to figure things out. And this won’t help you or your loved ones.
Deep breathing and mindfulness exercises can help you manage or lower stress levels. Find ways to be more present with your family or during your work hours. If you’d like more ideas on this, I share 10 tips to help working mamas manage stress in a Mompowerment post.
Make sure you take time for self-care. It’s easy to put your self-care on the back burner right now. Maybe this is what you usually do anyway. Self-care matters, especially in stressful moments. It might seem like self-care is another item on your never-ending to-do list, but it’s important in moments of uncertainty. And self-care isn’t only an occasional spa day or girls’ weekend.
Focus on small moments of self-care:
- Read a book for 6+ minutes (this can also help you with stress management)
- Write in a journal, especially to help you think through your feelings during the moment of uncertainty
- Exercise (even a short walk around the block may help)
- Laugh, preferably deep belly, tears rolling down your face laugh
- Give/get a hug (the 20-second kind where your heart feels better)
Want more ideas on finding time for self-care? Check out the Mompowerment blog to help you create time for self-care.
Check the voice in your head
You don’t need the voice in your head adding to the uncertainty you’re feeling. It might be helpful to find mantras that work for you. Write them down in places you’ll see them, like the front or back cover of your notebook. Put an index card with a mantra on your bathroom mirror to look at each morning as you get ready. A few that may help:
- “Things are uncertain, but I can handle uncertain moments.”
- “I have overcome challenges before, and I will overcome this.”
- “One step at a time.” (One of my favorites to keep the focus on right now.)
Spend time and energy on your mental health
When I talk about mental health, I’m referring to your emotional, psychological, and social well-being. Your mental health impacts how you feel, think, and actually engage with those around you. It’s integral to how you thrive or struggle as a working mother.
There are a lot of different aspects of mental health. The tip I want to mention here is to define and maintain your boundaries. Let colleagues, family, friends, etc. know what your boundaries are to help you better control your energy and mental health. Want more information and additional ideas? Head over to the Mompowerment blog on working mothers’ mental health.
That’s what I’ve got. I’ve shared my 7 tips to help working moms deal with uncertainty. What is helping you deal with uncertainty as a working mom? How are you making sure you keep moving forward and taking care of yourself?
Disclaimer
This content is not a substitute for direct medical advice from a doctor or other qualified medical professionals. If your feelings about uncertainty are interfering with your life or if you’re dealing with overwhelming chronic stress, depression, anxiety, or other mental health challenges, please reach out to a medical health professional or mental health professional near you or online to help you with your specific needs.
