On this Mother’s Day, I want you to know that you are loved, mama! You are loved by your kids, your significant other, your friends, your family, and your tribe. There is love all around you. On a day that celebrates you, make sure it reflects what you want it to look like.
There are definitely moments in motherhood when we feel totally isolated. It feels like no one else is dealing with what you’re dealing with. That might be true, but, chances are, a mother you know has dealt (or maybe she’s even is now dealing) with the same thing you’re going through.
Motherhood can sometimes be hard. There are seasons that are really tough. There is no question about that. You might be in one of those and it’s hard to see beyond that. Toddlerhood! Enough said.
The seasons of motherhood change, though, and another season will begin and end. Some will inherently be hard and some will be easy. It’s all about seasons in motherhood. And what you might find easy, other moms may find hard and vice versa.
We love our kids and yet they make us want to pull our hair out from frustration at times. It’s OK to feel both extremes, sometimes back to back. Feel all the feels and don’t feel bad about it. It makes you human to love your kids and sometimes feel frustration.
In all of it – the fun, the challenge, the hugs and kisses, the amazingness, the toughest moments – remember that you’re doing your best. Your best is all you can ask for. I feel like we constantly question that as moms – how can I do better or more? Truth is that your best is enough. I bet your best is actually a lot more than simply enough. It’s hard to see that in the moment, though.
It’s hard to see that our best is enough when we have messages all around us about doing more and being better and doing one more thing to show your love. It’s hard to know it’s enough when you see the images on social media of perfection. Don’t compare. It can rob you of so many moments of happiness. You never know what happens moments before or after that perfect image. You have no idea what happens when there isn’t a camera. Life is, after all, what happens between the pictures.
What happens if you are feeling alone because you feel like you’ve hit your stride. Could it be that I am feeling confident when everyone all around me is struggling? You are in your groove in the season of motherhood you’re in. Be comfortable with feeling confident. Feel comfortable talking to other moms about what you’re doing that works instead of only commiserating with the challenges. Own the things you do well. Help your fellow moms feel more confident in their mothering.
And, if you’re a working mom, this brings an added layer of complexity in how you feel as a mother and a woman. You’re trying to juggle all the things, but are you doing it in the “right” way? Whatever you’re doing is enough in that moment and it’s the “right” way. It’s all you can ask of yourself.
If you feel things are off, then start making adjustments. Instead of questioning your balance and your abilities as a working mom, feel confident owning your power to balance work and life.
It’s OK to love who you are as a woman, without focusing on you as a mother. That is amazing to love yourself for who you are in all your roles. It’s good to have your own personal moments away. It’s good to want to work and achieve goals that have nothing to do with your children. That doesn’t make you a bad mom. I bet it actually makes you a better mom. You’re filling your needs and you’re probably happier because of it. That trickles into all the areas of your life, including your family.
Know what you need and not only what your family needs. And I’m not talking the financial side of things. I’m talking about addressing all your needs – self-care, your identity, your desire to achieve goals that are yours, etc.
This weekend is Mother’s Day. It’s a celebration of you and mothers all over the world. Make this Mother’s Day what you want the day to be. You can have whatever kind of day you want.
Want to take a hike with your family? Do it.
Want to be alone. Do it.
Get pampered by your littles with breakfast in bed.
Take a spa day. Or do something oh-so-luxurious at home and take a bubble bath with wine or soothing tea or whatever makes you smile.
Have a picnic where you don’t lift a finger. Or go to a fancy brunch. Grill out to enjoy nice weather. Order and pick up pizza from your favorite pizza place.
It can be anything YOU want, but don’t feel you must do anything you don’t want to do.
Happy Mother’s Day, mama! You’re amazing!!!!
