It’s holiday time and you want to be with family. And the office has emailed, called or texted 5 times and you’ve only be out of the office 2 days. Can’t they figure it out on their own? Your client keeps trying to contact you and your out of office is turned on. Is it an emergency or can it wait until you’re back? Don’t they understand this is family time for you? Why can’t they respect your boundaries? Does this sound familiar?

The need for boundaries at work

Boundaries. It’s the magic word in all of this. A consistent piece of advice from the more than 110 professional part-time working moms who I interviewed was about the need to set and maintain boundaries at work.

Setting boundaries can be hard

Many of us want to be connected and not miss a thing. For some, setting boundaries means we might miss something. Deadlines don’t usually move for us. We move for them. A crisis might blow up or maybe we’ll miss a huge opportunity. And part of it is often simply trying to keep all parties happy. But, what’s the likelihood of these things being in play? I bet it’s generally low, especially if you schedule around deadlines and set up boundaries with your internal team, including managers, and your clients.

Technology as an enabler

Technology is a blessing and curse. It allows us to work from anywhere anytime, which we love. And it enables clients, colleagues, and managers to get a hold of us whenever they choose. If you combine that with people who don’t have their own boundaries or maybe you haven’t established yours, you’re in for a lot of interruptions from the office during your downtime each day.  And, remember, that it’s OK to walk away from the office and turn off technology.

The boundaries at work are important for so many reasons

• You want to pay attention to your family and be present.
• You need a break each day to recharge to perform your best.
• Time away from the office each day helps manage stress.
• You look at things with a fresh perspective when you can put them down for a while.
• It makes financial sense to work the time you get paid, especially when you work part-time.

Want some ideas on boundaries you can start to implement?

• No phone or electronics time for X amount of time each day or for the time when you’re with family unless it’s an emergency. I might check email or texts while I’m home with the boys, but I don’t usually respond to anything that isn’t urgent. And no phone at the breakfast or dinner table.
• Response to non-emergency communications (phone, email, text) within 24 hours or by end of day or whatever timeframe you’re comfortable with. You might be traveling, in an all-day meeting, sick, taking care of a sick child, working on a major deadline. Give yourself some wiggle room, so that people don’t expect you to respond in minutes and then keep contacting you until you respond.
• Make sure you define what an emergency is to your team, clients, manager, etc. Everyone you’re interacting with needs to be on the same page as to these definitions since they can vary from person to person or even project to project.
• Designate meeting or call days or times on your calendar, so that you have work time and time to get things done. For me, non-essential meetings happen in the afternoon once my boys are home, doing quiet time or getting their 20 minutes of TV time. That is 5 30-minute windows I have each week for things like networking calls.

How do boundaries help with holidays?

For most of us, holidays are time with family and close friends. These are sometimes people we don’t see all the time. We want those meaningful connections and moments that turn into memories. They don’t happen with constant interruptions from work. Having boundaries at work enable the moments to happen with family and friends during holidays and other important events throughout the year. And it’s your time away from the office. You should be able to use it as you like, focused on your moments, not on yet another phone call from the office. And, as an incentive, it’s a great example for your kids to see that there are times when work is important and time when family and friends are the focus.

Boundaries are set…now what?

The easiest option is to establish boundaries from the beginning of a relationship, either a new job or with a new client. If it’s an existing relationship, you need to create a plan and give time for people to re-adjust to new boundaries. Maybe you create a transition plan for yourself so that it’s not like a light switch between two sets of boundaries. It will take retraining a client, your boss or your team. You need to stick to your boundaries over time, though, even when things get iffy and pushback kicks in. You can do it!

I’ve focused on the consistent boundaries at work and how they impact you every day. If you’re interested in more on why vacation is important, since those are bigger boundaries, read my blog about the importance of vacation or time away.

What boundaries have your established with your team or your manager during this holiday season? Do you have tips on getting colleagues or clients to respect those boundaries?

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