Time with family and friends can throw you for a loop with everything else you’ve got going on. I’m sharing some of my tricks, insights, and research for making the holidays easier for working moms.  

Holidays can be fun AND stressful

If you’re like most working mothers I know, you work hard at work. All year long you’re balancing work and life. And then you add the holiday tasks to your already long to-do list. It’s a bit overwhelming thinking about it.

The holidays are often a time with family and friends. It can be a fun time with our loved ones. It can also be a stressful time because there are many moving parts. And, let’s be honest, we’re often aiming for the season to be special for our kids. There might be travel or getting our homes ready for guests, preparing the meal, extra time with kids when we’re trying to get stuff done, and all the usual coordination it takes when we interact with family and friends for holiday gatherings.

We don’t have to give 100 percent on everything all the time, even during the holidays. Pick and choose what really needs your energy. Be intentional with how you spend your time. What if you gave yourself a bit of grace during the holidays (and in life in general)? How could that help you better manage stress during the holidays?

Are there easier options?

It’s okay to simplify or make things easier. When you get that list for Thanksgiving lunch at your child’s school potluck, it’s OK to sign up for napkins or bring drinks. You don’t always have to be the one to make the entree. For years, I often made homemade desserts for kids’ school parties and it felt so good to sign up to bring napkins and plates one year. Especially if you’re busy at work, simplify where you can. And remember that someone needs to take paper goods or drinks, right? It can be you this year.

It might not be about a school party in your case, but figure out where you can simplify. Take a bottle of wine, grab bread and cheese, take a yummy treat from a local small business, or consider ordering the same gift for everyone. OK, it might be more reasonable to choose a gift for all the ladies on your list and one for all the men. Or, with high prices, agree to do one Secret Santa gift exchange instead of buying something for everyone. Save the special gifts for your kids and significant other. You get the idea, though. Simplify. Embrace easy, at least in some areas. Remember that complicated doesn’t always mean special.

Mental space during the holidays

Holidays are a busy time for us. I intentionally put energy into giving myself mental space during the holidays. Could you use some mental space during the holidays? That can help you actually enjoy the moments. There’s something that really makes a difference for me, especially during the holiday season. I put self-care on the calendar because it won’t happen otherwise.

And self-care and mental space can look different for you. Have that glass of wine as you clean or prep something. Take the bubble bath after the kids are down for the night. Hike with or without your family. Have a friend who is in town for the holidays? Grab lunch with him or her while grandparents or aunts and uncles entertain your kids. Do what you need to create a moment for yourself. You’ll be thankful you did.

Feel comfortable saying “no” to an event if it’s more than you can do on that day or in a week. You can find other moments throughout the year to spend time with people you care about. And they will understand.

Tips to make the holiday meal easier

• Order part or all of your holiday meal. Most major grocery chains have Thanksgiving or Christmas menus so you can purchase your feast online and pick up at the store. Some can even deliver to you for a small fee. There are often menus for local bakeries or specialty shops. Consider your budget and your preferences to find what you need.
• Choose a simpler menu. Could you do a slow cooker pot roast? Grab a honey-baked ham or maybe get a smoked turkey breast. Unlike a raw turkey that needs to be full-on cooked, those are both pre-cooked and need to be heated. It doesn’t take as long and they’re less work. Growing up, our family often ate turkey at Thanksgiving and Tex-Mex classics for Christmas. Thanksgiving ended up being more work and Christmas was an easier meal. Everyone always enjoyed both.
• Make it a potluck.
  • Let someone else bring the turkey or main dish. Some people love to cook turkey. Let that someone shine (and be OK with it not being you). And you can make some yummy sides and/or desserts. Or focus only on the entree and let others bring the sides and desserts.
  • It’s at your house, but all the guests can bring something. And be OK with what they bring. Give suggestions to complete the meal so that not everyone brings dessert.
  • Ask someone who doesn’t cook to bring bread, wine, fun non-alcoholic beverages, or even a veggie tray and cheese so that people snack while the final preparation happens.
• From scratch versus semi-homemade. Your whole meal doesn’t have to be made from scratch. If you choose to make the whole meal, some things can be pre-prepared (e.g., you make and then freeze weeks in advance) or come from a box. And some things can be partially prepared from a box or come from the store and then you add special touches.
• Easy dessert options.
  • Support local. Get yummy pies or cakes from a local bakery. Order these ahead of time or they might sell out!
  • Personalize grocery store favorites. Thaw tasty dessert from the freezer section of your local retailer and personalize with finishing touches. For example, thaw a cheesecake from the grocery store and add fresh fruit.
  • Dump cake, anyone? Get fresh fruit or frozen fruit that’s been thawed (I don’t recommend fruit in a can). Cut the fruit into bite-sized pieces. Put in the bottom of a baking dish. Completely cover this layer with raw cake mix. Yes, straight from the box. Don’t add anything to it. You read that right. Nothing. Get a whole stick of butter and thinly slice it. Cover as much of the raw cake mix as possible. The more that you cover, the better. Bake as per the instructions on the box. Trust me. Your guests will love it. And it takes you minutes to put it together. Add ice cream or whipped cream to make it even yummier!
  • Sundae bar for the win. Create an ice cream sundae bar with super simple toppings for dessert (think whipped cream, chocolate chips, chopped fruit, and chocolate syrup). You can be as extravagant as you want. Who is going to complain about this fun, tasty option? No one. We LOVE this option. If someone really cares that there isn’t a pumpkin pastry at the meal, they can bring one.
• Can you do a holiday brunch instead of lunch or dinner?  Breakfast and brunch foods are often much easier to prepare and cook, often taking less time and costing less. Maybe you can start a new tradition if you’re hosting. And remember that brunch can run from morning until mid-afternoon. 
• Use Artificial Intelligence (AI). Put all your recipes into AI to get an idea of a timeline. Forgot to get an ingredient? See what AI recommends for other options. Have a few ingredients in the fridge and want to see if you can make a new recipe? AI can give you ideas. You do want to make sure with an online search that the responses do make sense or are accurate. AI can give you ideas, but it’s still best to confirm they’re good ideas!

Do you have tips on making the holidays easier for working moms? Or maybe you have a great stress management trick. I’d love for you to share how you will give yourself a break and create some mental space this holiday season in the comments.

Looking for practical tips to make the rest of the year easier? Grab your copy of the award-winning Mompowerment Guide to Work-life Balance. Available on Amazon. (This is an affiliate link. I’ll earn a few cents if you purchase through the link at no additional cost to you.)