The final part of the three-part series on family travel is about traveling with toddlers. Traveling with your young children helps them become better travelers later on. Yes, toddlers can be challenging. Don’t let that stop your desire to do family travel. So, go ahead and book that fun destination and travel with your toddlers.
If you didn’t read them yet, check out the first two blogs in this series on planning family travel and traveling with young kids. Please note that I am including recommendations for products I used (my kids are now much older) and others that are recommendations from those I know who have traveled frequently with their toddlers. There are some affiliate links included below.
My experience with family travel
I get asked regularly about when we started traveling with our boys since each has already been to 10 states and 7 countries, including a few trans-Atlantic destinations. We traveled on a plane for the first time with our older son when he was about 18 months. We headed to New York City from our home base of Austin, TX. Our first international trip was to Cancun, Mexico over a long weekend.
There were hiccups along the way and some things that helped. And we learned a lot on these first few trips that gave us ideas on how to adjust things during subsequent travel adventures with a toddler. And then we got to try out our tips and tricks with our younger son.
When our younger son was born, we decided to continue our international travels with both our young boys. We took our first trip with our then 14-month-old and almost 4-year-old to Trinidad. Again, we learned a lot. And then we took our first trans-Atlantic flight a few months later.
On that trans-Atlantic flight, my younger son wanted to have nothing to do with my husband. Nothing at all. To be honest, he wasn’t so excited about daddy until about 18 or 20 months. Why should flying be any different? So, while my husband and older son slept on the flight, I stood there chatting with a kind flight attendant for three hours and did the mommy rock. You know the baby rock. It’s that side-to-side movement you do as a mom to help rock your child to sleep in your arms. Yep, three hours of that. And no sleep for me. It’s what needed to be done at the moment, though. And sometimes that is the case in life, whether or not you’re traveling.
On that trans-Atlantic flight. my younger son wanted to have nothing to do with my husband. Nothing at all. To be honest, he wasn’t so excited about daddy until about 18 or 20 months, so why should flying be any different? So, while my husband and older son slept, I stood there chatting with a kind flight attendant for three hours and did the mommy rock. You know that side-to-side movement you do as a mom. Yep, three hours of that. And no sleep. It’s what needed to be done in the moment, though. And sometimes that is the case in life, whether or not you’re traveling. I still wouldn’t change starting as early as we did with our boys when it comes to family travel.
I still think the trip was worth it. We were on our way to Ireland and the trip was lovely, even with a young toddler co-sleeping part of each night, constantly nursing for comfort. We loved our travels to Ireland and without hesitation, we’d recommend putting this destination on your family travel list.
Family Vacations vs Family Trips
I’m sharing tips so that your family travel moves away from a family trip to the point of a family vacation. There is a difference. I promise. A family trip is when you go somewhere and still have to work hard as a mom (or dad). A family vacation is when everyone—even you, mama—enjoys the experience. We’ve made the transition from family trips to family vacations, but that happened when the boys were ages probably around 7 and 4.5. We took at least one family trip per year for years, so I get it if you’re still in the family trip stage and feeling deflated (or wondering if it’s even worth it). It takes time to make it fully enjoyable for everyone. I still wouldn’t change starting as early as we did with our boys when it comes to family travel.
Think of traveling as building up a muscle. It takes time. You do it slowly over time and you constantly work on it. Traveling with a toddler especially is not different. They will become better travelers, but it won’t happen overnight. And that’s normal. They need to practice to get better at it. Practice does allow for progress, though.
Book a seat for your toddler
If you’re reading this and have already booked your family travel, I’m hoping you booked a seat for your toddler. If you haven’t yet bought your tickets, please book the extra seat. I realize it’s more expensive this way if you were planning on taking advantage of the kids fly free if they’re under two. Even though you might not use the extra seat the whole time you’re on a plane or train, you’ll be thankful for the space. I promise. One of our boys was usually in my lap for at least part of the time, but the extra seat gave me room to spread out and actually get comfortable.
I’ll also add that I’m not an expert on the topic of car seats on the plane. The FAA definitely has an opinion. It suggests traveling with a car seat or with a CARES child harness device. You can read more about the FAA perspective and make your own decision on traveling with a car seat on the flight.
The vast majority of my travel with toddlers has been on international flights. Travel with children 2 and under is a bit different on international and domestic flights. On international flights, they often give you a seatbelt for your toddler that attaches to your own seatbelt if your toddler is sitting in your lap. Ask for this, even if you have the extra seat when you travel internationally. It’s helpful in case your child ends up in your lap part of the time.
Change of clothes for all family members
You never know when your little traveler might make a full-size mess all over you on the plane or train. Have a change for everyone in your carry-on. I promise you’ll be happier because of it. I’ll also add that if it’s a long-haul overnight flight I actually bring the boys’ pajamas and let them change on the plane. They’re more comfortable and it feels more like our nighttime routine to get ready for bed. So much of travel with toddlers is trying to maintain their normal routines whenever possible.
Things to make airplane and train travel easier
There are a few items that might help you on the plane or train. Even before the pandemic, I always travel with disposable wipes to wipe down in the area on a plane or train. I especially wipe down the food/beverage tray because those never seem to be clean. I still do this, even with an 11 and an 8-year-old. You never know what germs lurk on a plane or train. And you know how young kids touch everything and then often touch their face. Someone in your family getting sick when you’re on a family travel adventure in another country is not fun. Trust me. Been there. Done that.
I suggest you take disposable placemats for the plane or train. They stick to pretty much anything and allow you to spread things out, especially food or favorite toys, without having to worry about how clean something is or how dirty you’re making the area. They are one-use, so use and toss. You don’t have to worry about cleaning them off or transporting dirty stuff in your bag.
I also recommend carrying disposable plastic bags, the ones you usually use for cleaning up dog poop. They are great to have around when you travel with a child who’s still in diapers! They come in a tight little roll, so they’re compact and easy to tear off as you need them. Who wants to handle stinky diapers on the go, on a plane or train, or in a hotel room? And I’m not really excited about leaving a stinky diaper in the hotel trashcan for housekeeping to dispose of. These days you don’t always get housekeeping when at a hotel, so you’ll come back to a horrible smell. Yuck for all involved. These little plastic bags are a God-send. They limit the stink and make the whole situation easier to deal with. And your fellow passengers, hotel guests, etc. will thank you. Your family will thank you too!
Keeping kids entertained on the plane or train
While electronics can definitely keep kids, entertained for hours, that is not always the case with toddlers. At least that has been my own experience. You must find other options and you must be ready to be hands-on.
We take a selection of toys we’ve purchased at Target in the dollar bins. I buy them on sale throughout the year, so they don’t break the bank. And I usually carry one per hour that we’re traveling. They are things like action figures, Hot Wheels cars, little toys they can build, etc. You know what your child likes, so buy whatever he or she will engage with.
We also take books. Sticker books were a huge hit with our boys when they were toddlers. Or there are the magnetic scenes that they can change up over and over. The only downfall of these is that they’re generally a bit heavy.
A friend of mine who does international travel regularly suggests window clings. I wish I’d thought of that when we were traveling with young kids. Our boys loved these when we played with them at home. They take up little space and are super light. And you can toss them once you’re to your destination.
If you’re traveling on a long flight and kids will sleep, make sure you have quick access to their sleep time items like a blanket and favorite stuffed animal. You don’t want to pack these in your suitcase by mistake.
One more thing to note. Take something you can play with in the hotel room when you have downtime. We have taken balloons for these moments. Simply filling them with air and letting them go can be something fun that kids love. It can definitely turn tears into laughter, at least it did with my boys. The bonus is they take almost no room in your bag.
Beware the food selection on planes and trains
Even when they were young, our boys were pretty open to new foods. We worked hard to get to that point. We still — to this day — always bring snacks when we travel. When you’re traveling to new places, you never know what food options look like, even with all the reviews you can read online. And toddlers can be p-i-c-k-y! One day they love a food and another day it’s a no-go.
We had food in pouches at the ready for our travels when the boys were younger. More than anything we used these for before breakfast since our boys always woke up crazy early, often before breakfast is served at a hotel. It helped get us to breakfast time and kept everyone quiet early morning. Trust me, your fellow hotel guests will be grateful. I do recommend you grab something like bananas or whatever is an easy food option from a store you might pass.
For family travel with any young kids, take snacks with you on the flight. Take a few snacks you know your child will eat and grab some things locally. Snacks are a great and easy way to open up your child to new food. And you’ll have the back-up snacks from home if you need them.
Don’t forget to bring food for you
You’ll pack all sorts of things for your kid(s) when it comes to snacks, but what about you? Don’t forget that you might need a snack or two, especially if you’re doing a long-haul flight. You might think you can simply buy something at the airport, but what if you have a delay? Or what if you’re running to catch a connection and don’t have time to buy something when you thought you’d have plenty of time. Domestic flights don’t usually have food beyond a small snack, so have snacks ready for yourself and your significant other, or one of the adults might be the grumpy traveler.
Getting around with kids
When our boys were younger, we couldn’t have survived without our Sit & Stand stroller. It’s got a spot to put an infant carrier if you still have an infant or a place for a toddler to sit in front where he or she can be strapped in. There is also a place without a back for an older child to sit. Our older son has always been a bit on the tall side and he still fit at age 5. He could also sit when he got tired. That meant we got places faster. Also keep in mind that this stroller has loads of room, so it helps with carrying all your carry-ons until you gate check your stroller. While you might think of carting around kids in the airport, remember to let your kids burn off energy in the airport. (More on this.)
Make sure that the tag the airlines puts on the stroller makes it a gate-checked item and not a baggage claim item. Yes, I know this from experience as well. Keep tags on your stroller with your info, even if you’re gate-checking it.
Enjoy the fun moments
I know that family travel with toddlers can be stressful and a lot of work for you. It can also be fun. Over that year I’ve enjoyed watching my boys play with local kids on a playground or try a new dish that they devour. I love watching their faces light up as they see something beautiful or interesting for the first time. When you’ve been to a destination several times, it’s so fun to see what they gravitate to and what they see that you might have missed.
And don’t forget that stepping away from your life is helpful for your own work-life balance as a working mom. You can step away from your usual routine and feel recharged because of all the new stuff you’re doing. Take time to enjoy those fun moments. Maybe have some time to yourself away from your toddlers when you can. A few moments of self-care go a long way. Switch off with your significant other to have solo time. You might even ask around your friends and family and see if you can somehow find a local sitter. You never know who your friends know who might be nearby.
What kinds of things have made your family travel easier or more fun, especially when you’re traveling with a toddler?
I’ll be adding a travel section to this website in the coming weeks. Check back so that you can get travel advice on itineraries.
